Improving peer-to-peer communication in secondary school

Secondary school is a critical stage for social development, where students are not only learning academically but also building their interpersonal skills. As researchers specialising in social dynamics and communication, we believe that effective peer-to-peer communication is a key skill for secondary school students. It not only influences their current relationships but also lays the foundation for their future interactions. In this blog, we will explore effective strategies for secondary school students to communicate issues with each other to foster a harmonious and supportive school environment.

Understanding the complexity of peer interactions: Secondary school is a melting pot of personalities, cultures, and viewpoints. Students must grapple with these differences to communicate effectively. Recognising and valuing diversity is crucial. Every interaction with peers is an opportunity to understand another perspective, which can enrich communication. It’s about finding common ground while respecting individual differences.

Conduct difficult conversations with tact and sensitivity: Discussing sensitive topics requires tact and empathy. When students approach their classmates with a problem, it’s important to use language that avoids accusations or confrontational tones. Using ‘I’ statements (e.g., “I feel bad when…”) instead of ‘you’ statements (e.g., “You always make me feel…”) can help to express personal feelings without triggering defensive reactions.

Master active listening: Active listening is more than just hearing words; it’s about understanding the message and the feelings behind it. Secondary school students should practise active listening by listening attentively, nodding, asking clarifying questions, and summarising what they have heard. This demonstrates respect and interest in the speaker’s point of view and promotes deeper understanding.

Develop conflict resolution techniques: Conflicts are inevitable, but they can be managed constructively. Before resolving a conflict, it’s important to understand its nature. Conflicts in secondary school often arise from misunderstandings, disagreements, or competition for resources (such as attention or recognition). Recognising the cause of a conflict is the first step to effective conflict resolution. Effective communication is at the heart of conflict resolution. Students should learn to express their thoughts and feelings clearly and respectfully. This includes using ‘I’ statements to express how you feel without blaming others (e.g., “I get frustrated when I’m interrupted” instead of “You’re always interrupting me”). Active listening is equally important. It’s about really hearing and understanding the other person’s perspective. Resolving conflict often requires problem-solving skills, which involve identifying the problem, finding possible solutions, evaluating them, and agreeing on the best course of action. It’s important that all parties involved can contribute to this process. Sometimes resolving a conflict means finding a middle ground. Negotiation and compromise skills are about understanding the other person’s needs and finding a solution that satisfies everyone to some degree. Role play can be an effective way of practising these skills. There are situations where conflicts cannot be resolved alone, and it’s important to recognise when to seek help. This may be a teacher, a school counsellor, or a mediator. Learning when and how to seek help is an important part of conflict resolution. After a conflict has been resolved, it’s important to focus on rebuilding and maintaining the relationship. This may include ongoing communication, setting new boundaries or continuing to work on mutual respect and understanding. Every conflict is a learning opportunity. Encouraging students to reflect on what they have learnt from the experience can help them to better manage future conflict. This reflection can be encouraged through writing, discussions, or mentoring programmes.

 

Recognising differences and promoting inclusion: Secondary school is an ideal environment for students to learn the value of diversity and inclusivity. Open discussions about cultural, social, and personal differences can foster an accepting and respectful environment. Activities that promote co-operation and understanding between different groups can reinforce these concepts.

Empathy, the heart of communication: Empathy, the ability to understand and share the feelings of another, is central to effective communication. It enables a connection that goes beyond the superficial level and creates a sense of support and belonging. Encouraging students to share their experiences and listen to others can foster empathy.

Navigating the online world: Digital communication plays a large role in the interaction between secondary school students. While it offers convenience and a wide reach, it also presents challenges such as misinterpretation and the potential for cyberbullying. Teaching digital skills, including online etiquette and the impact of digital footprints, is crucial. Students should be encouraged to behave as kindly and respectfully online as they’d in person.

To summarise, peer-to-peer communication skills are crucial for secondary school students, not only for their current social interactions, but also for their lifelong relationship skills. These skills include understanding diversity, empathetic approaches to conversation, active listening, conflict resolution, inclusivity, empathy, and responsible digital communication. By focusing on these areas, students can build a foundation for effective, respectful, and empathetic communication that prepares them for the complexity of relationships in their future personal and professional lives.

Karmen Erjavec and Sabina Krsnik, University of Novo mesto